Thank YOU: What My Struggle Has Taught Me
I can indeed be described as an emotional being, but sometimes I experience a slight hardship when it comes to expressing those emotions, hence why I am eternally grateful that I was blessed with the gift of writing.Today is a glorious day. But before I get into the story of why today is so special, I must share the story of my struggle that led to my victory.
The Lost
The moment I realized that I wouldn't be a college student for this upcoming semester didn't seem real to me. In fact, I treated the reality as if it were a dream, or reoccurring nightmare that would soon go away.
But of course it didn't.
And you wanna know why it didn't?
Because in REAL life, avoiding things does not make it go away, nor does it make any situation better.
And before I knew it, I was in a situation that at the moment, seemed impossible to escape out of.
- Not registered for school
- Important on campus job(s) had to be given up since I wasn't a student
- And more bills than I could handle.
For weeks, I fought like hell to get enough money to register for school, and even had a temporary holiday job, but with my own bills to worry about, paying for school just couldn't be a top priority.
Not to mention, I'm extremely stubborn and I HATED asking anyone for help. It is a vice that I am none too proud of, but one I desperately want to evolve from.
I struggled during this time in my life. I had many tear-filled days, sleepless nights, and I even had feelings of inadequacy.
Not being a student opened up new insecurities for me, simply because I was so used to being in school. Though the lack of my enrollment wasn't because of academic reasons, I still felt stupid about my financial situation.
I temporarily lost myself, something that many of us may do when life gets too tough.
My spark was out.
But God ALWAYS has a plan.
The Campaign
February 2, 2015 is when it all started. It was the last day in my office, that included dramatic tears and a "woe-is-me" attitude. I was STRESSED on this day, and still stubborn, and outdone with life. I just wanted to leave campus, climb in my bed, and further isolate myself from the world.
As I was cleaning out my office, a person who I adopted as my big sister suggested something that was incredibly absurd to me at the moment. She suggested that I create a Go Fund Me campaign to raise money to get back into school for the next semester while I looked for a new job or 2 so I wouldn't end up homeless.
Tell me why I was NOT for it, and came up with every excuse as to why I shouldn't do it?
Big Sister ignored my excuses, and went onto the website, inserted my email, created a password, made the first donation and then said, "HERE. Now promote this."
Though I STILL didn't want to, I filled in the details about my campaign and forced myself to click the share button so it could go on my Facebook page. Then I emailed some people the link, and the rest took off from there. Besides myself, I had many other people spread the word using various forms of social media that included Twitter, LinkedIn, Snap Chat, Instagram, and of course Facebook, whom Go Fund Me is partnered with.
My goal to raise was $2,000 and in 24 days WE raised $2,115.00 from 81 different people.
I'm still in awe to be honest. I couldn't believe that people were so generous, especially to little ole me.
The People
During the time of this campaign, people both surprised and disappointed me.
I won't call anyone out, but a lot of my disappointment came from the fact that people I EXPECTED to be there, seemed extremely ghost. I won't go into detail about what they didn't do, but after many pep talks from my best friend, I stopped focusing my energy on those people. I continued to go hard, and put all my energy into the ones who were helping.
And there were MANY.
People really surprised me. I once had this mentality that people were "not shit" and that was because I witnessed people do terrible things to others as well as me and I just didn't have that much faith in humanity.
But as I said... people really surprised me.
It's not only because they donated, but because they took the time to read my story, they promoted my campaign, they offered encouraging words, they prayed for me, and they simply believed in me enough to want to see me win. Even those who were unable to financially contribute helped me in the best way they could, and touched the hearts of people who had no idea who I was and led them to donate.
And remember when I said I was jobless at the beginning of my campaign too? Well, a wonderful person heard about my misfortune and she offered me a job doing something I LOVE, and I can honestly say that I am happy when I walk into work everyday.
I'm not sure what I did to have all these blessings and good fortune come my way, but whatever it is, I pray I keep it up so I can help others in the ways that people have helped me.
Thanks to YOU...
So as I said in the beginning of my post, today is a glorious day because.... I'M OFFICIALLY REGISTERED!
My university offers mid-semester courses that will start towards the latter half of this month and will continue to the end of the semester in mid May. I thought that I was going to have to sit out the entire semester and/or give up my full time job, but as I said.. God ALWAYS has a plan!
But none of this would be possible without you lovely people.
Lessons Learned
My struggle has taught me various things:
- Success is a journey not a destination.
There will be bumps in the road. There will be times that you want to give up. You may even temporarily give up. We all have our setbacks, but the joy is that we are always able to bounce back.2. Keep the FAITHIt's cliche, I know. And I was soooooo tired of hearing it. But one day, I realized how necessary it is to have faith when you are going through your trials and tribulations. Others may not see it but as long as YOU do, things will turn around for the better for you.3. There is NOTHING wrong with asking people for help. NOT ONE THING.I was under this false impression that adulthood means that you do everything by yourself and you're not supposed to ask anyone for anything. If you did, that means you're weak.
HOW WRONG WAS I??????
Closed mouths don't get fed, and I believe that God has placed some really good natured individuals on this earth. Once I started asking, there were so many people that I knew and did not know who were willing to help me. Many people (like me) hate asking for help because they have dealt with individuals who have "helped" them for their own selfish reasons and have thrown their deeds back in their face. Or, they have dealt with people who make a mockery out of their struggle, thus making you feel bad for even asking, and now you may feel weak.
However, I learned that you are NOT weak for asking for help. Don't let negative experiences with people scar you for life. There are STILL good people out here.
4. Everyone isn't meant to take your journey with you
When you are going through hard times, some people are not meant to keep you lifted during that period. Once I realized that, I stopped being upset at the ones who I "expected" to be there for me. I knew it wasn't because they didn't want to, but because that was not an assignment that God have given them. Everyone in your life isn't meant to be out on the battlefield with you when you're going through a war. Use the energy to become appreciative of the ones who are already there, and embrace the new people that come in when you least expect it.
5. Embrace your struggle. It makes the victory so much sweeter
Of course no one wants to go through hard times, but if life was such a smooth sail, ask yourself how appreciative would you be?
We tend to take for granted the little things struggle can teach us. Struggle develops independence, it can develop faith, it can develop so much strength and survival skills we didn't even know we had. Struggle develops your character. It's interesting to see what type of people we become when everything we ever had is taken away from us. Do we evolve into greater people? Or do we stay complacent and still stuck on ourselves?
Moral of the story
I'll never stop saying thank you. I'll never stop appreciating the kindness of you all, and I will continue to pray that all the good fortune and various blessings come into your life on behalf of helping me. I will continue to pay your kindness forward, by helping as many people as I can, in whatever way. So on behalf of myself, I want to give a public thank you to you ALL. I will remember this time in my life as long as I live, and will never forget the kindness, encouragement, and positive vibes you all have sent my way.
I'm not sure if everyone who reads this believes in God or considers themselves religious, but I hope he blesses you anyway.
XOXOXOXO,
- Kia.
Vent to the comments.
1) What has your struggle taught YOU?